You are probably wrong.

I know, it is hard to hear.

Shhh, don’t tell anyone but I have also been wrong….

Wanna know something else, I have been right but should have compromised instead of picking a fight.

Back in January, I set a list of resolutions that deliberately dealt with a few of my character issues. I thought today I would elaborate on number 2:

2)Compromise. Ask yourself if being right is more important than the relationship.

I don’t like to be wrong but even more than that, I don’t like being right and not having someone see it that way. Compromise is hard. If I am right, why can’t they just agree with me?

Have you ever watched a dog chase his tail? They are determined, relentless in their pursuit of the goal, sure that they will eventually catch the elusive toy. You and I can watch and think, that dog is a little crazy. What’s he going to do once he catches it, bite himself? Now, that dog has the best of intentions with a pure heart and strategy in mind but it probably isn’t the best of outcomes.

Sometimes we chase our “right” around and around. Yep, we are right and we are determined to prove it to everyone. But really, aren’t we just running in circles when we never take the time to see another point of view? Don’t we end up ignoring relationships, new thoughts and potentially making someone feel small or inadequate when we become so determined to “win”.

One of my favorite examples of compromise is Jesus and the adulterous woman. (John 8) Now, the people who threw the woman at Jesus’ feet were right, she deserved to be stoned according to their laws. Jesus never told the people they were wrong. Jesus was often put in a place of  having to choose between the law the Jewish people followed and the teaching of grace and mercy he was bringing. Compromise. Jesus never denied the people of their laws nor did he ever give up on his own being right in the teaching of mercy. He never compromised his purpose and was always loving. Jesus could have told the people in John 8 that they were wrong for wanting to stone the woman, he could have gone in circles like many of us do today in proving our points. What point would Jesus have made if he had just argued with the Pharisees that he was right?

Now, I know there are some things in life that are nonnegotiables. And, they should stay that way. But, there are other things that just, well, turn us into dogs chasing our tails. In the end we miss the relationships, we don’t hear new ideas and we end up looking a little foolish in our determination.

Is there something right now that you are absolutely right about, but is making you look like a dog chasing your tail? What would it take for you to compromise?