TearsI hate it. I do everything I can to avoid, hide it, pretend it doesn’t need to happen.

Oh no, here it comes. That uncontrollable need to just cry. My feelings are hurt, my toes have been stepped on. I can’t come up with the words to express my frustration. No, maybe that’s anger. It’s just sadness. Maybe it’s everything.

Shame, Shame, Shame.

I shouldn’t need to cry, right?! I mean, it’s 2013, shouldn’t I act like a man, buck up and just fix it. Walk away from it. Logic says crying isn’t going to solve it, not going to change it.

I’m tired of feeling ashamed of my tears. I’m tired of being afraid if someone sees me crying, sees my weakness.

I cry over a lot of things. Things that bring me joy and happiness. I cry when I am angry. I cry when I can’t comfort another or while I’m comforting a friend. I cry when my children make me proud and frustrated. I cry when I am overwhelmed by the goodness of God and overwhelmed by the desperation I see in the world. I cry from grief. I cry from pain. I shed tears for hope and the hopeless. I shed tears in repentance and in worship.

Psalm 56:8 You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.

I’m tired of hiding my tears. There are too many days that I hide the heart God has given me to feel passion, love, joy, hope, sadness, anger, frustration, compassion, pride, desire because somewhere along the way I started to believe my feelings didn’t matter, they aren’t logical, they don’t fix things. Have you ever seen a man or woman change the situation, change the course of the world, change a neighborhood, a community, or a home with out tears?

I believe that we are driven by our hearts desires, passions and hopes to change the world around us. When we believe those things don’t matter, we lose sight of the purpose we were created for. It is the fire in your heart that will move you to great things. Our tears are an expression of the very things that makes us wonderful, keeps us from complacency and moves us to use our lives for greater things.

Don’t feel shame in your tears my friend and together we will learn to use our hearts cries to make a difference.

~Angela

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